When it comes to delivering an epic maid of honor speech, there are a few must-dos and even more please don’ts. While these dos and don’ts may seem pretty obvious to most people, you’d be surprised at how many speeches are ruined by too little of the former and too many of the latter. To ensure that your maid of honor speech goes off without a hitch, we’ve put together a list of our top heck yeses and hell nos.

DO introduce yourself

Unless you’re somehow acquainted with every single family member and friend of the bride and groom, chances are that there will be many people attending the wedding who will have no idea who you are. To give some context as to why you’re the one delivering the maid of honor speech, take a minute to introduce yourself and talk about your relationship with the bride.

DON’T tell your life story

Seriously, don’t make this about you. The hundred-something people in the audience don’t care that you broke your arm when you were 7 or that you’re scared you’ll never meet the man of your dreams. The only thing they care about is the love between husband and wife, so stick to that. Any talk of yourself needs to be in relation to an experience or memory involving the bride and groom.

DO talk about the couple

Too many MOHs make the mistake of talking about the bride the entire time and fail to ever mention the groom or the two as a couple. We get it, you’re the maid of honor and you’re supposed to talk about your experiences with the bride… but that’s not all you need to cover. The sole reason you are delivering a maid of honor speech is in celebration of the new Mr. and Mrs., so make sure actually acknowledge the couple and their matrimony.

DON’T tell inside jokes

The problem with inside jokes is that only a select few are actually on the inside, leaving everyone else wondering what the hell you’re even talking about. So unless your goal is to make people feel excluded, we suggest ditching them altogether. Instead, give your stories the background and context needed to make your audience feel included enough to find your jokes funny.

DO be yourself

The bride asked you to be her maid of honor for a reason, so don’t do her a disservice by not being your true self. A genuinely great maid of honor speech is one that is spoken from the heart and in the words of the person delivering it. Which leads us to this…

DON’T copy off the internet

We repeat: speak from the heart!! Yes, it’s okay to use a nice quote or toast that you find online, but don’t copy and paste the entire speech. Not only is that extremely lazy, it’s totally messed up. If you can’t be bothered to take the time or make the effort to write a personal and heartfelt speech, you should consider stepping down as maid of honor.

Lastly, DON’T

…tell any extremely embarrassing stories about the bride or groom

…mention any exes or past romantic relationships

…say anything that about the wedding “finally” or “actually” happening

…ramble on without a clear ending (check out our 10 speech-ending toasts)

…even think about using the word “divorce”

…get drunk before delivering your speech 

WHAT’S NEXT: 20 Questions to Help You Conquer Your Maid of Honor Speech 

A list of 12 dos and don\'ts when it comes to writing and delivering a maid of honor speech #maidofhonorspeech #howtowriteamaidofhonorspeech #ModernMaidofHonor #ModernMOH

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