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We doubt Modern MOH was your first stop on the “how to write a maid of honor speech” search train, but we do hope to be your final destination. You see, unlike most articles you’ll find on the subject of wedding speeches, we’re actually going to give it to you straight. No vaguely basic outlines or generically boring examples, just the cold hard facts. Because we have some serious experience in the toast department, and if there’s one thing we’ve learned about writing a killer maid of honor speech, it’s this: there is no secret formula, no one right way. How could there be? Each and every relationship between a maid of honor and bride is different from the next, just as each and every memory is uniquely yours. So stop looking for speeches to steal off the internet and start writing your one-of-a-kind story using our 5 D’s.

 

1. Define your objective

Before you begin writing your maid of honor speech, you must first define your objective. In other words, you need to have a goal you’re looking to accomplish. For example, are you hoping to make wedding guests laugh? Cry? Both? Do you want talk about your history with the bride, about how you met the groom, or what their relationship as a couple means to you? Knowing the answers to these questions will help you figure out the direction you should take when writing your maid of honor speech. If you find yourself struggling to define your objective, simply think of your relationship with both the bride and groom. Do they have a great sense of humor? Is your time together spent mostly joking around and laughing? If so, try taking a comedic approach to your speech by cracking a few funny jokes along the way. Or maybe you and your bride have been through some very serious times together that you want to share, in which case your speech may be much more emotionally moving. The great part about this objective is that it’s your own, so there is no one right or wrong way to go about it.

Our advice: Touch on a little bit of everything. Start strong with a joke or two and finish out with a sentimental toast (download our 10 favorites here). While there is no exact formula to it, a truly killer maid of honor speech is both funny enough to get wedding guests laughing and moving enough to bring a tear to their eye. Secondly, don’t spend so much time talking about your history with the bride that you forget to talk about the groom. Even if you don’t have your own personal memories with your BFF’s new hubby, that doesn’t mean he should be left out of your speech. Instead, talk about their relationship as a couple and what it means to you, including your wishes for their future together. If you find yourself stuck, check out our list of prompting questions to give you some ideas on how to write a maid of honor speech.

2. Decide on your point of view

The key to writing a killer of maid of honor speech is to not think of it as a speech, but instead a story. And as the narrator of this particular story, it’s up to you to determine the point of view from which you tell it. While it may seem obvious that you’d write from the first person POV, there are definitely some benefits to switching it up. To begin with, writing from a third person POV will give your speech a unique twist and a more story-like feel. For example, instead of saying “Taylor and I met on the school bus in the third grade and she’s been my best friend ever since”, you could say “When Taylor was in the third grade, she met a little girl on the school bus who remains her best friend to this day”. Like the idea, but don’t think you can write an entire speech that way? No problem. Unlike what you were taught in grade school, you have the freedom to switch between differing points of view when telling your story. If you haven’t caught on yet, let us reiterate: there is no right or wrong when it comes to writing your speech.

Our advice: Take advantage of switching up the points of view. Start with narrating from the first person point of view, especially if it’s easier for you to tell the history between you and the bride that way, and when it comes time to talk about the couple, tell their story from an outsider’s perspective. If you do decide to go this route, don’t get so crazy with it that you start confusing your audience. The whole point of using different points of view is to enhance your maid of honor speech, not complicate it.

3. Determine your must-haves

Now that you’ve defined your objective and decided on your POV, it’s time to determine your must-haves. By must-haves, we mean the anecdotes you absolutely want to include in your maid of honor speech. For instance, is there a particular memory you have with the bride that you definitely want to share with wedding guests? Or maybe you were there when the bride and groom met and you want to tell your side of the couple’s story. Determining your must-haves before you begin writing will guarantee you don’t forget to feature them. Not to mention, it will keep you from going off track when it comes time to put pen to paper. If you’re having trouble narrowing it down, keep this in mind: it’s much better to have one or two epic stories than a mix of mediocre ones.

Our advice: Don’t be that maid of honor that goes on and on about memories and “funny” inside jokes you have with the bride (no wedding guest wants to hear it, trust us). Instead, tell one or two really great stories that portray your friendship and then move on to her relationship with the groom. Too many MOHs make the mistake of making their speech all about them and not enough about the couple they are supposed to be celebrating. If you want to talk about yourself in front of a big audience, try Youtube.

4. Develop your story

As we mentioned before, the key to writing a killer maid of honor speech is to tell it like a story. And just like any great story, you must develop it from beginning to middle to end (think along the lines of “once upon a time” to “they lived happily ever after”). While it’s entirely up to you to decide what constitutes the beginning, middle and end of your particular story, you should avoid big jumps in time. In other words, do your best to develop it in chronological order so you don’t confuse wedding guests. For instance: Start by telling the story of how you and the bride met, continue on with a memory you have of the bride and groom, and finish with a toast for the couple. Again, there is no magic formula when it comes to writing a maid of honor speech, but having a clear and concise story line is highly suggested.

Our advice: Don’t be predictable. Chances are you and your best friend didn’t cross paths in some epic way (especially if you’re sisters), so skip the generic “this is how we met” story. Instead, dive right into a funny/crazy/holy s*$&! moment to get the crowd’s attention. And don’t be boring with your finale either. No generic “cheers to the Mr. & Mrs.”, we know you can do better than that. Your goal should be to receive a standing ovation, not a polite golf clap.

5. Describe your characters in detail

We can’t stress how important this final step is when it comes to writing your maid of honor speech. Seriously, taking the extra step to describe your characters in detail is what differentiates the bland from the bomb. And just so we’re clear, by characters we mean the bride and groom and by detail we mean elaboration. For example, instead of saying “Taylor is such a great friend, she’s always been there for me whenever I needed her”, you should say “I’ve never met a more loving and loyal person than Taylor, she truly exemplifies what is means to be a best friend”. These extra tweaks may seem insignificant to you, but they’re exactly the lines that will resonate with your audience and more importantly, the couple. And if writing isn’t your strong suit, don’t worry. Simply speak from the heart, you’ll be surprised at how well your final product turns out.

Our advice: Use a thesaurus (seriously, we do it all the time). It’s a great way to spice up your word choice and will stop you from repeating yourself. On the flip side, don’t feel like you have to use a ton of fancy words- you want to sound like yourself after all, not Shakespeare. Lastly, don’t be afraid to throw a bit of alliteration in there. It brings character to your writing and makes it much more memorable (see what we did there?)

Wedding day is the equivalent of Christmas morning to us here at Modern MOH. We absolutely love everything about it- from the hair, makeup and picture taking to the dinner, drinks and dancing that follows. Because this is your final day as maid of honor, we want to make sure you have an absolute blast and go out with a big ol’ bang. To guarantee your bestie has the wedding of her dreams and you have the time of your life, we’ve put together a list detailing day of duties for a flawlessly fun finale.

 

Getting Ready/Pre-Ceremony

bridesmaids laughing with bride
Bradley Images, Inc.

1. Create a Timeline and Stick to the Schedule

 Trust us when we say that this is the key to a successful wedding day. While it may seem a bit overboard to have everything planned out to the minute, it’s absolutely necessary if you don’t want to be rushed for time or end up running late. Not to mention, nothing will stress your bride out more than a bridesmaid who is still getting dressed when pictures are supposed to be starting. To avoid such unnecessary anxiety, simply get together with your bride beforehand and work out all the details- from what time you need to be up and showered to the order in which everyone gets their hair and makeup done. Pro tip: Make sure you plan to be ready at least a half hour before pictures start in case you end up running behind (and if you stay on schedule, that’s just more time to sip bubbly!)

2. Be Prepared for Any and All Emergencies

No matter how properly you’ve planned for this day, there are bound to be a few hiccups along the way. In anticipation of any unforeseen catastrophes, we recommend being prepared for everything short of a natural disaster (we’re only half kidding). Now you may be asking yourself, “how and the hell am I supposed to do that?”, to which we say, “we got you, girl”. Check out our itemized list of everything you’ll need in your wedding day emergency kit. Unfortunately this list doesn’t have a solution to dealing with drama, whether it be bridesmaid or monster-in-law related, so here’s our advice on that: Do whatever you have to do to make it go away. Tell Ashley her hair looks just as good as Stephanie’s (even if it looks like a bird’s nest) and Mrs. Miller she’s blessed that her son is marrying such an angel (even when you want to tell her she’s the devil). No matter what, your number one job is to make sure the drama doesn’t touch the bride on her big day.

3. Keep Your Eye on the Bride

If we haven’t made it clear by now, let us say it one more time: nothing is more important than making sure your BFF has a drama-less and stress-free wedding day. To do so, you must constantly be on the lookout for any potential stressors: including the bride herself. With all of the nervous excitement floating around, it’s common for brides to get some serious wedding day jitters that left untreated, can lead to an all-out meltdown. Avoid a bridal breakdown by keeping your BFF occupied and upbeat throughout the getting-ready process. We recommend creating a wedding morning playlist full of sing-your-heart-out, dance-your-booty-off songs to keep the vibe light and fun. Side note: A glass of bubbly here and there never hurts, but be sure to keep an eye on just how much your bride is tossing back (her walk down the aisle shouldn’t look like a field sobriety test).

4. Ensure That Everyone (Including Yourself) is Fed and Hydrated

While sticking to the schedule is the key to a successful day, staying nourished is necessary if you want to survive the night. We all know that consuming alcohol on an empty stomach never ends well, so it’s imperative that you and your girls get some food and water in your system pre-ceremony. Nowadays it’s common for the venue or hotel to provide a light lunch while getting ready, so go with that option if available. If not, talk with the rest of the bridal party, as well as the MOB and MOG, about splitting the cost of catering (Panera and Chick-fil-a are great options). Just a heads up, it’s very likely that your bride won’t have an appetite with all the butterflies she’s feeling or will refuse to eat for fear of not fitting in her dress. Don’t fall for it! No matter what she says, it is your job to make sure she doesn’t faint at the altar (not kidding, we’ve seen it happen). Oh, and while you’re running around force-feeding everyone, don’t forget to save some for yourself.

 

During the Ceremony/Pre-Reception

bride and groom at the altar
Life DePICted Productions

1. Fluff the Train and Hold the Bouquet

Aside from making it down the aisle without falling on your face, these are the only two things you must do during the ceremony. We grouped them together because they go hand in hand and are really quite simple. Once your bride has made her grand entrance and meets up with her hubby-to-be, you’ll immediately want to fluff out the train of her gown so it’s flowing beautifully behind her. It may seem silly, but we recommend bending over in your dress a few times before the ceremony to guarantee there’s no accidental flashing or split seams come go time. As soon as you finish fluffing, stand up and take the bride’s bouquet so she can hold hands with her man. Because you’ll be holding both her and your bouquet for the remainder of the ceremony, we also recommend practicing your grip before walking down the aisle.

2. Bustle the Train and Make Any Other Adjustments

Now that your BFF has said “I do”, it’s time to celebrate! Before you party the night away, you must first make sure the Mrs. doesn’t trip over her dress on the dance floor. It’s more than likely that you’ve attended at least one fitting with the bride, therefore have already practiced bustling the dress. If not, we suggest a trial run pre-ceremony so you have a basic understanding of how it all works. Bustling is no piece of cake, so it’s very important you take your time and get it done right. If for any reason you can’t figure it out, ask for the help of the wedding coordinator (they have tons of practice with all types of gowns) or a fellow bridesmaid who has bustling experience. Once you’ve tackled that task, help the bride with any other hair or makeup adjustments she may need. Pro tip: This is also a great time to have the bride use the bathroom seeing as she’ll need your assistance in holding up her dress.

 

During and After the Reception

bride and bridesmaid dancing at the wedding reception
Life DePICted Productions

1. Feed the Bride (Part 2)

Yes, we know we’ve been over this once, but we’re back at it again to tell you just how important a duty this is. We can’t tell you how many brides skip eating their dinner because they get so caught up in talking to and taking photos with guests. First of all, no food should ever go to waste, especially a meal that the couple spent a lot of time and money on selecting. Secondly, your bride is guaranteed to lose steam halfway through her reception if she doesn’t have some fuel to run on. And that’s where you come in. If you see that the bride (or groom) is being kept from the sweetheart table, make it a point to remind them that dinner is served and they’ll have plenty of time to socialize during the remainder of the reception. This also includes drinking water, so be sure to keep your girl hydrated. Trust us, no couple wants to spend their first day as husband and wife nursing a hangover from hell.

2. Be the Life of the Party

Once you’ve taken care of your bride and have eaten your own meal, it’s time for the real fun to begin. Unless there is an especially carefree (or already intoxicated) guest, chances are that no one has ventured to the dance floor just yet. While it’s not entirely on your shoulders to get the party started, someone has to be the one to do it. So grab your guy or fellow bridesmaids, request your favorite song, and hit the floor. Trust us, it won’t take long for others to follow suit. As the night goes on, be sure to keep an eye out for any party poopers and see if you can’t get them up and moving. It will truly mean the world to your bride that you took the time to guarantee that every single one of her guests has a good time. Plus, there is nothing funnier than seeing Uncle Joe do the wobble.

3. Help with Clean Up

When the final song of the night has ended and guests start making their way to the exit, that’s your cue to begin wrapping it up. Most couples hire a company to take care of the clean up and breakdown, but it’s your responsibility to collect all personal belongings and have the other bridesmaids do so too. If you got ready at the venue, do a sweep of that area as well. Do your bride a favor and double check with whoever is taking home the gifts and decorations, oftentimes her mom, to guarantee that nothing valuable gets left behind. While most venues will have a lost and found, it’s a major pain to have to go back the next morning to retrieve forgotten items. During clean up, take the time to thank both sets of parents for their contributions to the wedding.

 

P.S. Don’t forget to have a wedding day Snapchat filter!

He asked and she said yaaasssss!! Now that your bestie has a new rock on her finger, it’s time to shower her with celebratory gifts. We know there are a ton of options out there, but it’s ultimately up to you to decide which engagement gifts best reflect your BFF’s personality. To help make your decision a bit easier, we’ve narrowed the choices down to our four favorites for every modern day fiancé.

 

1. Clothing

The first must-have on our engagement gifts list is clothing (duh!). Every fiancé deserves to flaunt her new title for all to see and there’s no better way to do so than with a super cute shirt. Again, it’s up to you to decide on which style matches your BFF best, but here are our preferred picks:

grey v-neck that reads engaged af
Engaged AF, ninety5prints
pink t-shirt that reads future mrs.
Future Mrs., BrideBikini 
grey t-shirt that reads fiance
Fiancé , FreeSpiritInk
pink t-shirt that reads miss to mrs
Miss to Mrs., up2ournecksinfabric

 

2. Drinkware

After you’ve decided on a shirt, it’s time to move on to gift number two: drinkware. Whether your bestie is a coffee addict or wine lover, there are tons of options in this category to choose from. Many of these also include a groom gift as an added bonus! Here are a few of our favorites:

coffee mug that reads future mrs allen
Future Mrs. Mug, HappilyChicDesigns
coffee mug that reads does this ring make me look engaged
Engaged Mug, MarylandVinylDecals
stemless wine glass that reads this is my wedding planning glass
Wedding Planning Glass, RedLineDesignsShop
stemless wine glass that reads future mrs michel
Future Mrs. Glass, HappilyChicDesigns

 

3. Home Decor

Next on our engagement gifts list is something the future Mrs. can display in her home. From picture frames and signs to ornaments and wedding day countdowns, there is no shortage of decorations to choose from. Here are our top choices for each:

personalized photo frame
Engagement Picture Frame, fieldtrip
heart shaped map
Framed Map, PoppyandErie
personalized engagement ornament
Engagement Ornament, fieldtrip
wedding day countdown blocks
Wedding Day Countdown, FingersnThumbsCrafts

 

4. Wedding Planner

Now it’s time to give your bestie something to help with all of the planning she has to do for her big day. Weddings require a ton of organization nowadays, so your future Mrs. will really appreciate having a personalized guide to help her along the way. Here are our favorite finds:

floral wedding planner that reads forever and always
Forever and Always, PurpleTrail
white marble wedding planner that reads my wedding planner
My Wedding Planner, BlushAndGoldInvites
wedding planner that reads future mrs thomas
Future Mrs. Planner, PaperPeachShop
floral wedding planner that reads hailey jones
Customized Wedding Planner, PaperLuxStationery

 

If purchasing and packaging separate gifts isn’t your thing, consider going all in on a engagement gift set. The best part about these is that you can go a big or small as you like, depending on your bride-to-be and budget. Here are four options that range in size and price:

personalized engagement gift box with coffee mug and jewelry dish
Future Mrs. Set, HappilyChicDesigns
personalized engagement gift set with wine tumbler and wine split
Engagement Gift Box, SimpleSentimental
engagement gift box with wine glass, shirt and bracelet
Bride Gift Set, ArtandDecoShop
engagement gift box with shirt, coffee mug, jewelry dish and candle
Engagement Gift Basket, TheTinyOwlCo

 

P.S. It’s never too early to start thinking about bridal shower gifts

When it comes to modern day bachelorette parties, matching attire is a must. No longer do the bride and her maids simply follow the traditional white and black dress code, they wear custom coordinating tops too. Besides looking adorable in group photos, these tees and tanks are a magnet for good times. Seriously, what better way to score your BFF some free drinks than to announce she’s a bride-to-be? Not to mention, they totally save you the hassle of planning yet another outfit (hallelujah!). To help you along your search for the perfect pick, we’ve narrowed it down to our thirty favorite finds, broken down into five fun categories, guaranteed to transform your girl gang from basic baches to boss babes.

 

The Classics

Tried and true for every crew

bride and bride squad tank tops
Bride x Bride Squad, BTSapparel
bride and tribe shirts
Bride x Tribe, bdactivewear
i do and i do crew tank tops
I Do x I Do Crew, HelloBridalClothing
wife of the party and the party shirts
Wife Of The Party x The Party, RoseGoldRebel
bride, bride's babes, and babe of honor shirts
Bride x Babe Of Honor x Bride’s Babes, RoseGoldRebel
yasss and that's what she said shirts
Yasss x That’s What She Said, CowsxCacti 

 

The Party Starters

Keepin’ you styled while s**t gets wild

I got the hubby and we got the bubbly tank tops
I Got The Hubby x We Got The Bubbly, LVRandCo
love drunk and just drunk tank tops
Love Drunk x Just Drunk, RoseGoldRebel
buy me a shot and bride's drinking team tank tops
Buy Me A Shot x Bride’s Drinking Team, BridalBellsCo
bride and boujee and bad and boozy tank tops
Bride And Boujee x Bad And Boozy, keeplifesimpledesign
I'm gettting married and we're getting drunk tank tops
I’m Getting Married x We’re Getting Drunk, BTSapparel
future mrs and cheers bitches tank tops
Future Mrs. x Cheers Bitches, HappyHeartApparel

 

The Aquaholics

For a splish n’ splash themed bash

the bride to be and bride's mate tank tops
Bride To Be x Mate Of Honor x Bride’s Mate, GirlsLoveGlitter
nauti bride and feeling nauti tank tops
Nauti Bride x Feeling Nauti, TheBridesLastBash
aloha bride and aloha beaches tank tops
Aloha Bride x Aloha Beaches, HappyHeartApparel
sun, sand and a ring on my hand and sun,sand and a drink in my hand tank tops
Ring On My Hand x Drink In My Hand, HelloBridalClothing
trading my tail for a veil and time to party our tails off tank tops
Trading My Tail x Party Our Tails Off, Bachette
bride and I washed up like this tank tops
Bride x I Washed Up Like This, Bachette

 

The Destination Location

When the wear is all about the where

vegas before vows tank tops
Vegas Before Vows, WanderaDesigns
my last bash and smashed in nash tank tops
My Last Bash x Smashed In Nash, BTSapparel
beignets, booze, and besties shirts
Beignets Booze & Besties, RoseGoldRebel
I said yes and we said Charleston tank tops
I Said Yes x We Said Charleston, FlamingoFiesta
fiesta siesta tequila repeat tank tops
No Time To Siesta x Fiesta Siesta, BrilliantBridalShop
look like a beauty and party like a beast tank tops
Look Like A Beauty x Party Like A Beast, Bachette

 

The Sicker Than Your Average

‘Cause ordinary is oh so boredinary

te amo and te quila tank tops
Te Amo x Te Quila, RoseGoldRebel
bride chill and girl gang tank tops
Bride Chilla x Girl Gang, Bachette
llama get married and llama get drunk shirts
Llama Get Married x Llama Get Drunk, ShirtasticStudio
can't touch this and mc hammered tank tops
Can’t Touch This x MC Hammered, Bachette
ringleader and welcome to the shit show tank tops
Ringleader x Welcome To The Shit Show, PunchDrunkDesignCo
bridin' dirty and they see us rollin' shirts
Bridin’ Dirty x They $ee Us Rollin’, Quteez

 

What’s Next: 5 Fundamental Bachelorette Party Decorations

Congrats are in order, your best gal has asked you to be her maid of honor and you said yes! Now it’s time for you to answer another question, just what does a maid of honor do? Whether it’s your first time being a right-hand woman or you’ve had the title before, the role of maid or matron of honor comes with its own unique share of responsibility. Lucky for you, we’ve got the breakdown on all you need to know leading up to and during wedding day. Cross everything off this maid of honor duties checklist and you’ll go down as the GMOHOAT (greatest maid of honor of all time).

 

Post-Engagement/Pre-Wedding

3 girls smiling while one hold hers ring finger out

1. Support System- We All Need Somebody to Lean On

Your BFF may have a new rock on her finger, but it’s your number one duty as maid of honor to be her Dwayne Johnson during the wedding planning process. Yes, this includes listening to endless talk of invitations, centerpieces and monster-in-laws. While the bride may prefer to make the big decisions on her own, she’ll generally look to her maid of honor, aka second in command, for differing ideas and opinions. Be sure to keep in mind that this day is not about you, so don’t take offense if your advice is not always taken.

2. Leader of the Bridal Party- Head.Bridesmaid.In.Charge.

Being a best friend to your best friend? Piece of cake. Being the boss of a bunch of bridesmaids? A bit more complicated. As we all know, each bridal party is different than the next. Some are made up of a close knit group of friends while others can include complete strangers. No matter your situation, it’s one of your maid of honor duties to keep all the bridesmaids up to date and on the same page regarding everything wedding related. A great way to keep the lines of communication open is to start a group message through text or email. Remember- the bride is up to her eyeballs in wedding planning, so your role as middle(wo)man between her and her bridesmaids takes a lot off her already full plate.

3. Wedding Dress Shopping and Fittings- Build a Bride

One of the most exciting maid of honor duties is helping pick out the dress. Not only do you get front row seats to a private bridal fashion show, you get to watch your bestie fulfill her childhood dream of becoming Cinderella. Whether it takes trying on 1 or 100 dresses, seeing her eyes light up as she sees herself in “the one” will be an experience you’ll cherish forever. Once she’s said yes to the dress, it’s your responsibility as maid of honor to attend all the following fittings. Throughout this process, you will also assist the bride in the search for her wedding day accessories- shoes, jewelry, veil, etc.

4. Bridesmaid Dress Shopping and Alterations- Shop in the Name of Love

Now it’s your turn to channel your inner child with an adult version of dress-up. Depending on the bride, she may have already picked out the style of bridesmaids’ dresses you’ll be wearing. On the other hand, some brides allow for the bridesmaids to search for their own style of dress. In this case, it’s up to you to choose which style and cut are most flattering and comfortable to you. As maid of honor, it’s your responsibility to make this process as smooth and stress-free as possible for the bride AKA keep the other bridesmaids in line. Also, you are in charge of paying for any alterations that must be made as well as making sure the rest of the bridal party does the same.

5. Go-To Girl For Guests- What’s the 4-1-1?

This is one of those maid of honor duties that may not end up applying to you, but just in case it does, you should always be prepared to answer any and all guest questions. Although all information relating to the wedding can be found on both the invitation and on the couples’ website, there may be some guests who need further assistance.  Again, your BFF is busy with wedding planning, so anything you can do to alleviate some stress will be greatly appreciated.

6. Plan and Host the Bridal Shower- Let the Games Begin

One of the most rewarding maid of honor duties is throwing your bride-to-be a fabulous bridal shower. For many brides, they remember this get-together of family and friends as the first time they said to themselves “holy crap, this is really happening!” Needless to say, it’s your duty to knock it out of the park. Before you panic, remember that you’ll have the help of your fellow bridesmaids to share responsibility and split costs. Our advice? Delegate a task or two to each of the bridesmaids, whether it be bringing a shareable dish or providing the plates, cups and utensils. Pro tip- Don’t be afraid to ask both the mother of the bride and the mother of the groom to assist in any way they can, they love being involved in the process!

7. Plan and Book the Bachelorette Party- Girls Gone Wild!

Let’s be honest, this is the event we’ve all been waiting for- a grown-up, girls-only weekend getaway! As the maid of honor, it’s your time to shine. Nowadays, it’s most common for the bride to have a destination bachelorette party, in which case you have some serious planning to do. On the other hand, you bride-to-be may choose to stay closer to home, which means the travel and stay may already be figured out. Either way, it’s one of your maid of honor duties to assist the bride in choosing the location and lodging that fits her personality. Once these major details are decided, you’ll want to search for the best restaurants, bars and activities that your destination has to offer. Having a basic itinerary of must-sees and dos will guarantee that you make the most of your trip. To go above and beyond as maid of honor, you can put together gifts for the bride and bridesmaids that include all the essentials for a bachelorette bash!

 

Wedding Day

two bridesmaids helping the bride get dressed
Bradley Images, Inc.

1. Take Care of the Bride- Momma MOH

The role a maid of honor must assume on wedding day is much like that of a mother looking after her child. Like a child, the bride must often be coddled, soothed, and force-fed their meals. Their tears must be dried and noses must be wiped, and don’t be surprised if you find yourself helping your bride to use the bathroom. Like a mom and her diaper bag, many maids of honor find it helpful to pack a wedding day emergency kit in case of any minor or major “uh-ohs”. We also suggest putting together a getting-ready playlist to keep the bride’s mood upbeat and her mind off of her wedding day jitters.

2. Stick to the Schedule- Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That

As we mentioned above, wedding day makes a nervous wreck out of any bride, so it’s on of your maid of honor duties to make sure that you and the rest of the bridal party are paying attention to the clock. With all the excitement of getting dressed up and sipping on pre-wedding bubbly, it’s easy to lose track of time and get behind. A simple way to keep everyone moving is to have a pre-set schedule of the order in which all the bridesmaids will be getting their hair and makeup done. As the clock starts winding down to go time, make periodical announcements to the girls so they know how much time they have left to get themselves dressed and picture perfect.

3. Fluff the Train and Hold the Bouquet- Bend and Snap

Hallelujah! You’ve successfully made it down the aisle without falling on your face, now you finally get the honor of standing by your bestie’s side as she says “I Do” to the man on her dreams. And it’s your duty to make sure she does so while looking absolutely breathtaking. As soon as the bride takes her spot next to her future hubby, your job as maid of honor is to adjust the train of her dress so it spreads behind her for all to admire. If she is wearing a veil you may need to make adjustments on that as well. Once you’ve fluffled and flowed to perfection, you’ll be in charge of holding the bride’s bouquet throughout the remainder of the wedding ceremony, handing the bouquet back to her as she prepares her exit down the aisle.

4. Bustle the Train and Any Other Adjustments- Do the Bustle!

You thought fluffing the train was hard? Just wait til you see the bustle! Trust us, no matter how many times you’ve practiced during fittings, executing it flawlessly on wedding day is a whole other story. Both your and the bride’s adrenaline will be through the roof, so remember to stay calm and follow the seams. If there is a wedding planner on site, don’t hesitate to ask for their help. During this time you will also want to help your BFF with any other wardrobe or makeup adjustments so she goes into the cocktail hour looking and feeling her best. Hint- this is a great time to help your bride use the bathroom!

5. Feed the Bride- Momma MOH Part 2

Remember what we said about force-feeding? We weren’t playing around. Too often the bride will skip her own dinner due to overwhelming nerves and excitement. It’s one of your responsibilities as maid of honor to make sure your bestie is full of the yummy wedding food she spent lots of time and money on selecting. While you’re at it, be a good friend and make sure her new hubby eats as well.  Pro tip- As you see the bride’s drink getting low, slip a glass of water in her hand.

6. Deliver a Speech- Toastin’ and Roastin’

To be given the privilege of celebrating the happy couple with your very own words is what truly puts the H in MOH, which is why many find this to be both the greatest and most terrifying duty of them all. Whether you have the public speaking skills of a well-polished politician or the thought of giving a toast in front of a room full of guests sends you running for the hills, you are obligated to do the very best you can. We promise you that the bride and groom’s only wish is that you speak from the heart… and that your maid of honor speech doesn’t embarrass them too badly in front of their new in-laws. Oh, and one more thing, a little touch of liquid courage never hurt anyone, just be careful you don’t over-do it.

7. Be the Life of the Party- Don’t Just Stand There, Bust a Move

It’s every bride’s biggest fear that her guests will leave the reception having not had a great time or that her wedding will be remembered as being just “ok”. It is your role as maid of honor to make sure neither of those two happen. How, you ask? DANCE! If you have to be the first one on the dance floor then so be it, because it is your duty to get everyone up and shaking their booty. If you see any guests looking bored or tired, ask them if there’s a certain song they’d like to hear and make a request to the DJ. Speaking of the DJ, it’s your responsibility to report any issues or changes the bride and groom may have or want with the music. Most importantly, make sure your BFF spends as much time on the dance floor as she does mingling with guests- the reception tends to fly by and you don’t want her missing out on all the fun!

8. Clean Up- Everybody Do Your Share

Unfortunately all good things must come to an end, the wedding reception being one of them. As exhausted as you may be from a long and emotional day, it’s your job to make sure that the bridal suite and reception area are cleared of all personal and guests’ belongings. This goes for the rest of the bridal party as well. Before anyone heads back to the hotel or out for an after party, have them do a sweep of the area to ensure they aren’t leaving anything behind. The last thing you’ll want to have to do is return in the morning to pick up any forgotten items, especially gifts. When saying your final goodbyes, don’t forget to thank both the parents of the bride and groom for all of their help with the wedding planning.

With so many bridal shower decorations out there, how do you even begin to narrow it down? You don’t. You stop what you’re doing to read this article because we’ve already done it for you. Being maid of honor is tough enough, let us guide you through the decorating process as seamlessly as possible. Below we’ve listed eight of our essentials to revitalize any venue and turn your BFF’s bridal shower into a fête fit for a queen.

bridal shower welcome sign

1.Welcome/ Countdown Sign

We hope that everyone who steps through the door knows why they’re there, but if not this serves as a great reminder. All jokes aside, displaying a welcome sign by the entrance makes a great first impression for the bride and her guests. It also doubles as a sweet keepsake she can later display in her home or office. Depending on how creative you are (or are not), you can choose to turn this welcome sign into a DIY project or simply purchase a premade template to print and frame. If you want a ready to go, shipped to your door option, check out this super cute wooden welcome sign. Pro tip: Get everyone excited by having a welcome sign that includes a wedding day countdown or DIY a separate countdown to use during pictures.

future mrs banner

2. Banner

Let’s be real here, all brides need a glamorous banner to pose for pictures under. Go above and beyond as maid of honor by purchasing a customized option for your bestie’s bridal shower day. The hardest part is choosing which style- will it be a future Mrs., soon to be Mrs., or the bride and groom’s wedding hashtag? Either way, your bride will be touched by the extra step you’ve taken to make her day special.

bridal shower backdrop

3. Backdrop

Now that you’ve gotten the custom banner, it’s time to step it up a notch by adding a bridal shower backdrop. Keep it simple by incorporating a color-coordinated tinsel curtain or paper tassel garland, great for hanging behind the chair your bride will be using as she opens her gifts. Continue on the customization with this brunch & bubbly backdrop which makes for another picture-perfect posing place.

pink love balloon

4. Balloons

The final of the B’s we deem essential when it comes to modern-day bridal shower decorations. And no, we aren’t talking the basic balloons you find at a kid’s birthday party. We’re talking the super cute, totally fun balloons you see boomeranged on every future bride and bridesmaids Instagram account. Like these absolutely adorable gold heart balloons or this love balloon banner. Want to keep on track with the personal touch? Grab two of these single letter balloons, one for the first initial of each the bride and groom (or simply the first letter of the last name your bestie will be taking). Pro tip: Make a backdrop out of balloons with this DIY garland kit.

diy balloon chandelier

5. Pictures

You’ve checked off the must-haves for picture taking purposes, now it’s time to talk about using photos as bridal shower decorations. While you don’t need to display every single photo the couple has taken over their time together, it’s important to feature a select few that show off the special experiences they’ve shared. We love the idea of using this cute clothespin frame to document the journey from past to present through old and new pictures. We love this times two because it is another great keepsake for the bride and groom to display in their home. Pro tip: Tie your photo display into your balloon decorations, and totally wow your bride, with this DIY balloon chandelier.

floral mason jar decorations

6. Table Decorations

Just as your BFF was in charge of picking out her reception table decor, it’s up to you to do the same at the bridal shower. Start by getting your hands on enough tablecloths to cover the display tables (gifts, games, pictures, etc.) as well as all tables where guests will be sitting down to eat. Not only do these tablecloths come in handy during the clean-up process, they are a great way to tie into the color scheme or theme of the shower. Spice the tables up by adding simple touches such as ring-shaped confetti, gold votive candle holders or mini floral centerpieces.

from miss to mrs napkins

7. Tableware

If you’ve ever been to a bridal shower, or seen photos online, you know that bridal-themed tableware is all the rage. Let us first mention that you do not have to get custom everything, or anything for that matter, but a few fun touches are a great way to go above and beyond. We suggest picking one or two things to buy custom and purchasing bulk for the rest. For example, pair cheap color-coordinated plates with these personalized napkins. Or serve drinks in colorful solo cups while guests sip from these engagement ring straws. Take it up a notch by purchasing items that can double as guest favors, such as these custom bridal shower cups or these personalized glass coasters.

cupcakes with diamond toppers

8. Dessert Toppers

Oh yes, we went there. Remember, being a modern maid of honor is all about taking it to the next level and that means never overlooking the small stuff. Like adorning your cupcakes with these adorable diamond ring or sparkly heart toppers. Or maybe you’re serving a single cake, in which case this bride to be or elegant love topper make for the perfect final touch. We know minor details like this may seem excessive, but trust us when we say it’s these little accessories that will really wow your BFF.

 

What’s Next: 15 Inexpensive Bridal Shower Favors